choose your -ism / insightful punditry

Malcolm Turnbull: Why do Anarchists love him?

A survey of Melbourne Anarchist groups has exposed an alarming rise in support for Malcolm Turnbull amongst anti-parliamentarians. Further hard empirical evidence for this trend can be seen in Elizabeth Farrelly’s casual interviewing of her anarchist friends, as reported in ‘The Age’.* Glocalpundit interviewed several local Kropotkin lovers to ascertain why so many of these apparent revolutionaries are discarding their beliefs at the sight of an amiable middle aged politician.

‘I just think his progressive attitude towards gay marriage matches my own’

‘I just think his progressive attitude towards gay marriage matches my own’, says local anarchist Samwise Gilda-Coss, over a flat white and avocado panini during our interview on Sydney Road. ‘And the way he ran that campaign for the republic, well tactically it was ineffective, but symbolically, it really just stirred my heartstrings and made me doubt my commitment to a stateless future based on a socialist federation of trade unions. I mean, his belief in market solutions and the privatisation of welfare are a little bit full on, but I really like the way he handled the whole Bill Henson censorship debacle, I actually have a few Hensons myself and I really don’t think they’re overly pornographic.’
Mr Gilda-Coss then proceeded to chant: ‘Viva Henson, Viva el arte erotico’ for ten minutes, at which point we had to terminate the interview. Based on this wide ranging qualitative survey of one person, Glocalpundit has concluded that Malcolm Turnbull poses a grave threat to the Anarchist movement in Australia, which has already become endangered due to infighting, ASIO harassment  and Trotskyist cyberbullying.

If you see an Anarchist in your neighbourhood, reassure them that tactically inept politicians are not a legitimate substitute for the coming utopia, or tell them to call the Anti-state helpline



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